Hah. It’s 03:06 and it figures I’m here.
It’s also been something like 2 and a half years since my last post? Wild.
Well, I’m still here.
I came on here to look for pieces of my past and we’ll if I didn’t find them! What a whirlwind college was. Reducing life to bullet points and a summary. Well here’s some more:
Had a pretty standard existence, adulting and drinking too much and attempting to eat vegetables.
Met a girl at summer camp in the Catskills
My perfect lil house broke
Decided I wanted to marry her because I saw a familiar hurt behind her eyes that looked like mine
Got engaged to that girl and discovered that life was better than it always made itself out to me as
Went home to NC and succinctly sabotaged all of my independent relationships, without knowing
Left my job at CTC because my boss decided I wasn’t worth keeping
My landlord kicked us out because gentrification is a bitch
Up and moved to NY to be with my lady with almost no money
Went to Disney World for the trip of my dreams thanks to my lady’s mom
Trying to figure out who I am and it’s hard in a world that could care less
Well there ya have it.
I’m feeling the emotional weight of not feeling good enough, feeling screwed in the head by my mother who loved me and psychologically abused me to no end and attempting to stomp out the sexual shame that comes with succumbing to your natural self even if it’s been beaten into your skull that That Isn’t Exactly Right. Depression is a hell of a drug.
Luckily my lady takes it in stride, holds me until the sobbing stops, tries to make me laugh and ends up licking my teeth to get me to smile. Yeah, she’s pretty fucking great.
Either way, I’m still here and so are you. So let’s get down to brass tax.
What do you want?
